Kalzumeus Software Logo

Kalzumeus Software

My name is Patrick McKenzie (better known as patio11 on the Internets). Once upon a time, I was an engineer. I had an idea for some software. Programming it was pretty easy. Marketing it was not, but I really enjoyed the new challenge. At some point over the years, I graduated from being an engineer to running a software business. I’ve been blogging regularly since 2006 — check out my greatest hits for a curated list of the best stuff I’ve produced, or read this if you want the brief overview.

Kalzumeus Software is named after a dragon in a long-forgotten RPG campaign. It’s so hard to find available .com domain names these days, I swear.

I love talking to other small businesses at any time, for any reason: please, drop me an email. I respond to as many as I can, time permitting. Nothing makes me happier than helping people out. See the Standing Invitation for details.

These days I’m working at Stripe on Atlas. Opinions expressed on this site are my own.

Some Things I've Done

I've run a few small software companies over the last few years, but am not actively involved in any at present. Some examples:

Bingo Card Creator

Bingo Card Creator makes bingo cards for teachers. This was my first business; I ran it from 2006 through 2015.

Appointment Reminder

Appointment Reminder makes automated phone calls, emails, and text messages to the clients of professional services business. I founded it in 2010 and sold the business in September 2016.

Kalzumeus Software

Kalzumeus Software is the catch-all umbrella for my consulting business (which was mostly active from 2010 through 2012) and occasional side projects.

Recent Blog Posts

Identity Theft, Credit Reports, and You

September 09, 2017

This is outside my usual brief, but one of my hobbies is that I used to ghostwrite letters to credit reporting agencies and banks. It is suddenly relevant after the Equifax breach, so I’m writing down what I know to help folks who might need this in the future.

Continue Reading →

Kalzumeus Podcast Episode 14: Running A Business Portfolio with Jonathan Siegel

May 10, 2017

Jonathan Siegel is a buddy of mine who lives in Tokyo. I can’t decide whether I’m more floored by the fact that he runs five businesses at once or has eight kids. He recently wrote a book The San Francisco Fallacy, mostly to share his experience with running software businesses for the last two decades with folks who might be getting a wee bit too much of their advice from Techcrunch.

Continue Reading →

Kalzumeus Software Year In Review 2016

December 30, 2016

I’m Patrick McKenzie, perhaps better known as patio11 on the Internet. I ran a succession of small software businesses from 2006 through 2016. They started out as a side project and took over my professional life.

I try to publish a retrospective at the end of every year, including what happened, what I learned from it, and what the numbers looked like. This helps force me to plan, keeps me honest about how plans worked out, and hopefully helps some readers improve their own businesses. You can read the writeups for 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014. (I didn’t do one of these writeups in 2015. Starfighter had just launched; the entirety of the writeup would have been “This was the year I worked on Starfighter.”)

Continue Reading →